It's a Matter of Choice
It's a Matter of Choice
There's a reason one of the defining factors between an animal and a person is that one has the ability of choice. To act with intent is what separates humans from an animalistic nature.
I think the ability to make decisions for oneself is the biggest blessing, and sometimes it can seem like the biggest curse. That's the struggle with being young, a decision made now can seem monumental, like deciding to work here or pursue this program, or even "Should I eat the cake?" sounds like it can impact a lifetime. However, it also must be put into perspective in the form of hishtadlus: yes, doing this internship will look great on a resume, but it won't guarantee access into the proverbial corporate door.
Just as eating that piece of cheesecake won't deem you fat for your event two months ahead. Choices can act as catalysts or stepping stones but are not the framework. I look back at this year, and I’m overcome with the choices that were made. Some decisions were (seemingly) in my hands while others were made regardless of my input. When I’m fortunate to see that “hindsight is 20/20”, I count that clarity as a blessing, but usually, it's all about trust. Trust that there's a higher plan, that's out of our hands.
The decision making part is easy, it’s the living with the outcome that usually makes us doubt.
Here are my go-to rules to make decisions with confidence:
Go With Your Gut. Regardless of external bias, sometimes listening to that little intuitive voice is what drives great choices, even though you can’t quite define the reason for your leaning toward one way or the other- listen to that voice. She knows, and she’s usually on the same page as mom!
Educate Yourself. Don’t be afraid to ask the questions that will make a difference. How much of a raise in salary are we talking? Does this salad contain sugar-free dressing on the side? To make an educated decision, you must have all the info; otherwise, when new data will arise, it may drive you to second-guess your choice. The decision making part is easy, it's the living with the outcome that usually makes us doubt.
Seek The Input of Those That Know all the Variables. Sure it's great to call up your seminary teacher when a life-altering decision is on the table, but does she know you? She may know one aspect of yourself, but regarding your long-term life aspirations, you may be better suited asking someone who knows you NOW and has your best interest at heart. In this respect I’m fortunate, my mother is that person …in the same vein my "mum" can be biased as well :)
“Diversity in counsel, unity in command,” a significant aspect of decision making is the ability to ask those who know and to discern for yourself what is the best course of action.
Don’t make any life-altering decisions when you’re emotional; be it hangry, vulnerable, or anxious.
You're Never Wrong When Your Right. No matter the choice, never compromise on your values and integrity, your morals should be the unifying factor behind all decision making.
Sometimes taking a step back is what allows us to see the situation with a clearer perspective, try to remove yourself from this decision, if it were someone else what would you say?
Stand By the Final Decision, but Know how to Pivot. So many a time even the best of choice seem wrong because they don’t go 100% according to plan- learn how to rotate, it's not a sign that your decision was flawed but rather a sign of trust.
